This week has seen some moments of significance to me in my roleplaying games hobby. It’s not that you expect the next game to be one which is so strongly meaningful but it’s hard to deny those moments when they strike home. Three different events have transpired to change where I am at the end of 2024.

Fellmyr Resurrected

The first event arrived Monday in-between chatting online and running the third session for Frank T when a couple of the RPR gamers asked to play in Fellmyr. The resurrection of the Fellmyr game within a month of the last session of face-to-face play in that world was a pleasant surprise.

The significance of the game was being reminded why I enjoyed Fellmyr in the first place – it being a game created originally for the school club but having transcended that ideal. But more than this, playing with the Dungeon Fantasy RPG again reminded me of my deep love affair with GURPS as a system.

EXIT 23

Thursday midday was the scheduled time for returning to Alternity through the Dark*Matter setting, specifically to run (again) the fast-play scenario, “Exit 23”. This was significant because it marked a return to my all-time favourite RPG, Alternity, and the chance to demo it for curious RPR players.

What I didn’t expect was both the hearty support for the system from the participants and my own deep enjoyment from running the scenario. I could feel the difference in my GMing skills and confidence throughout the game session, marking an unseen shift in my sense of who I am as a gamer.

GOING INTO SPACE

On Thursday evening and through into Friday, I began something that I have not had the courage to contemplate over the past few years: I sat down with GURPS and began to imagine a new science-fiction setting for a game based around a space station on the edge of human territory.

I have found the vast toolkit of GURPS both fascinating and terrifying. When it came to learning the game system and running scenarios, I have chosen to use the Dungeon Fantasy and Monster Hunters resources rather than specify my own system adaptations of GURPS. The lone exception was Simple Dungeon GURPS… until now.

REFLECTING CHANGE

Something has shifted where I am as a roleplayer as I close 2024. Certainly having returned to face-to-face play since early January has been a very large part of this change. I’ve found new confidence and new friends through roleplaying games – something that I have sorely missed since the pandemic.

Yet a deeper shift has occurred and I realised it after turning back to Exit 23 and Fellmyr. I am not experiencing the crippling levels of anxiety that I experienced only a few months ago before any new game. Another change has been the stronger conscious sense I have of actively running my games with intent.

Under it all, there is a qualitative rise in my level of enjoyment through play.

Making connections with good people who want to play in games I run has proven critical to my mental health recovery over the past four years. Learning to unpick and rediscover my own preferences and learn new approaches has also been highly significant.

Admitting that I want to create a science-fiction game arose from all of that.

On one level, I think that I could happily create a run a game powered by Alternity and bring that old favourite back to the table. On another level, the long-latent game designer inside also reaches out to adapt and develop that science-fiction world for use with the world’s most flexible and robust RPG system, GURPS.

Either would work fine yet I am facing down the Resistance that I feel whenever I sit with GURPS and imagine building my own worlds with those tools. It’s a system that asks more of the GM than most others but it’s one that rewards you by offering a game run as you envision it, unencumbered by the assumptions and prescriptions of other designers.

This week has seen some moments of significance to me in my roleplaying games hobby. As ever, I don’t know where they are leading me but I am curious to find out.

Game on!